Tag: loss

Letting Go of Something Good

“Letting go” isn’t usually easy — especially for me. It doesn’t matter what it is. It’s much easier for me to let go of things I know I don’t need and don’t care about — but what about when it’s something I really care about?

This one’s for me.

“Letting go” isn’t usually easy — especially for me. It doesn’t matter what it is. I’m incredibly sentimental. My closet in my living room has been opened a total of 5 times since I’ve lived there (3 years)! I have yet to clear out its contents because I have some sort of sentimental attachment to those things (awards, memorabilia, etc.). Also, I’m pretty sure there are spiders in there and I’m not really built for that kind of battle.

It’s much easier for me to let go of things I know I don’t need and don’t care about — but what about when it’s something I really care about? What if I have to let go of something God has said is for me? What if I have to let of something that’s good for me? What if I have to let go of something I never expected to part with?

Well, that’s me right now. I won’t go into great detail; but I wanted to express some ideas that have been swarming through my mind.

  1. My trust cannot be in the good “thing’s” ability or likelihood of coming back. I must trust that if God needs me to have it, it will be God’s ability and responsibility to restore it.
  2. I have to consider that what’s good isn’t necessarily what’s best.
  3. When I give up something good, I have to realize that I’ll always win. If I give it up and cling to God, I’ve automatically won. Although, if I’m honest, I don’t always know what that looks like nor am I amped to cling to God in moments like these. Sometimes, I just want to stomp my feet, pout, and demand that God does things my way. This sort of reaction indicates a certain idolatry in my heart toward the thing(s) I let go of.
  4. Although it may be good for me, it may not be good for me right now.
  5. How secure am I in who God has said I am? Do I need this thing in order to feel secure, confident, worthy, etc? Nah.
  6. God will often draw you to Himself in moments of loss (of any proportion). This is almost always the highest purpose or result when loss occurs.
  7. There are no shortcuts for dealing with the pain. There are many seemingly worthy substitutes that make it easier to cope with the pain. They help soften the blow of the loss. However, if maturity is what you seek, you’ll know that eventually you will have to part with the temporary for the ultimate. You’ll have to embrace and face the pain head on.
  8. God is not cruel nor is He interested in making you suffer without purpose. In most cases, our suffering is not due to God bringing some judgment. It’s often due to our poor decisions, decisions of others around us, or attacks from the enemy (Satan).

While God does not cause much of our pain, He will use it for our good. Romans 8:28 says, “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.”

All things — suffering, work together for my good.

All things — loss, work together for my good.

All things — obscurity, work together for my good.

All things — rejection, work together for my good.

All things — (fill in the blank), work together for my good.

It is important when you are walking (sometimes crawling) through a season of loss to watch where you put your focus. Social media is a trap I’ve found myself falling into many of times.

Scrolling through highlight reels of the lives of those around me serves as a constant reminder of what I’ve lost or doubt I’ll ever have. Eyes up. Meditating on what was and being worried about what will be — eyes up. Getting stuck in grief, bitterness, self-hatred, frustration with God — eyes up.

God will always be the remedy for what we’ve lost.

He can be trusted. Let this verse permeate your heart in this time:

“The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness” (Jeremiah 31:3).

 

Ctrl, Alt, Del

“We don’t have to ponder on what was or wasn’t, but what is and will be. The true treasure is found in our applying lessons of yesterday to today.”

Control. Alt. Delete. This is my go-to when a computer decides to act rachet (see urban dictionary). When you enter that combination, your computer SHOULD give you the option to restart or shut down. When that doesn’t work, then you KNOW something is wrong. If only life worked this way…

Sometimes, you just wish you could start over. Maybe not completely; but many of us have a point in our life, we’d quickly consider starting things over from. I suppose there’s nothing wrong with wanting things to have been a certain way. There’s probably nothing wrong with wanting to do things differently.

However, I believe the true treasure is found in our applying lessons of yesterday to today. We don’t have to meditate on should’ve, would’ve, or could’ve. We don’t have to ponder on what was or wasn’t, but what is and will be.

My saying this does not mean I’ve never thought, “Man, I could’ve done this if THAT had never happened. I would’ve been here if THIS had never happened.” I’ve had more than my fair share in meditating on the past and still struggle with it from time to time. My issue, most of the time, is thinking TOO MUCH about the future. God, help me.

If I had to choose between dwelling on the past and regretting past decisions, or getting the most out of where I am now and having hope for the future, I’d choose the latter. I’ve reached a place where I’d rather keep pressing forward to see that which God has prepared for me. As afraid as I am of the future at times, I have confidence that whatever lies before me is surmountable if my eyes are on Christ.

The book of Hebrews says it best.  “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything(every weight) that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God (Hebrews 12:1-2).”

Dwelling on the past hinders us from reaching true purpose. Sin will entangle you and keep you from reaching purpose. We have to throw aside EVERY weight. Don’t let the past be a weight that slows you down from reaching purpose.

Here are some things to hold on to if you find yourself regretting your past or feeling like you’ve wasted time:

We don’t get to change how we started, but we can affect how we finish. There are experiences I’ve had that were not life-giving that at times shook my faith that anything good could ever happen. Even when I don’t know how the good will come or when the good will come, deep down, I know it will. I hang my hat on that.

Your future is brighter than your past.

The people you surround yourself with affect your future. Find some people in your life to hold you accountable and encourage you to move forward in your life.

God uses the good as well as the bad. So, even if it hurts or hurt, God will use it to produce something beautiful (if you let Him).

Keep your eyes on Christ. We become what we focus on. If my eyes are set on Christ, my identity is no longer found in the things I did or didn’t do in my past, but in Him.

God is a redeemer of time. This should not encourage us to waste time. Instead, it should encourage us that if we’ve turned in the right direction that the things of the past will be used for our benefit and His glory.

I hope this has encouraged you today. Keep your eyes fixed on Christ.

Happy reading!

Over and out.

 

*I do not own (the rights to) featured picture.